Thursday, December 18, 2014

A Picaresque-pade

  • Discovered much treasure in a false bottomed chest! Two magical scrolls!
  • Ambushed four lizardmen and the monk was pummeled to within an inch of his life. 
  • Tricked two lizards into leaving their lair. 
  • Discovered much treasure! A Red Apple Cup that will heal the weary when filled with with apple based alcohol, made by hobbits no doubt (when cider is poured into this goblet, it may be drunk to heal 2d8+4hps, once a week). 
  • Also an old lizardman named Wrecan who offered all his knowledge in exchange for help escaping to a safer swamp. 
  • Left the the Fane of the Sun Swallower to return to the Dw-Orcs hideout. 
  • Ambushed Dw-Orcs and drove them off, killing their mother. Took one prisoner. 
  • Found a large dragon egg and used a Unseen Servant to hide it in the small swamp skiff.
  • Addendum:
    • The Mirror of Truth does not reflect illusions. Resident Devil Palmonides will answer one more question for Althea. He says that Arrows of Dragon Slaying are held in the Fortress of the Warlord Monks, 100 miles from Blackmarsh, in the northern chaos wastes of the Kraal. This happens to be where Que was trained as an monk. The fortress was corrupted by Chaos.


Monday, December 1, 2014

In Pursuit of Death Itself

Having recovered from their travails and thoroughly sick of the spoilt brat of an elf princess, the heroes responded with favor to the Good Knight Sir Istivin's request for assistance.  The town of Cromm's Hold had been attacked by a night dragon!  It only left when given the ransom of a forgotten relic of Water.
While the folk of the town buried their dead and rebuilt their walls, Althea the Enchantress, Per the dour ranger, Q the Monk of Ellsworth, and Artamesis Witchling of the Elf Queen, braved a fetid swamp in search of the thieving dragon, crowded in a small boat, poling their way through a maze of foxtail, will-o-whisps, and reeds. They slept in a mysterious shipwreck miles from the sea.  They battled dwarfling-orcs before discovering a ruined Temple of the Sun, inhabited by Lizardfolks and fiery glanded beetles, whom they slew mercilessly, gaining many treasures.
A dank eve passed in a mouldering library and the heroes steeled their nerves for more adventure!

The Adventures of Althea the Enchantress Continue

They Rescue an Elven Princess


A sylvan fellowship of itinerant castaways met for a drink in a blackened oak overlooking a smoking bay, hazy in the light of a winter sun.
Before long, they were drinking with the prince of the manor himself. He told them a sad story of a lost sister many moons ago, who jeweled broach had been returned that very day by a peddler who peddled in the foothills of the Klarkasch Mountains.
Happy to help, the group walked a day and a half to a pile of rocks that cleverly concealed an ancient dwarven watchtower.
They were moved by the tears of a small girl who was not an elf. They chased the Fawn into the rocks where they were ambushed by soporific old man. He mustn't have seen the pointy ears, for his spell did naught to the fey folk, who approached him straight away and demanded an apology.  The old man was smitten by a strong willed white witch and invited them in for tea.
Upon crossing the furrowed threshold a bratty voice shrieked and complained and ultimately commanded a rusty old clockwork robot to assail the group.
It was rough going for a moment as the young martial artist Q went toe to toe with the thing, but then the White Witch snatched little Elsbeth's chain and the Red Wizardess charmed the girl and soon enough the situation calmed down.
The wizard disappeared. The elven princess was brought home to her father to his great joy and chagrin, and the party was handsomely rewarded, with blue jewels and with the wizard's ill-gotten gains (a magical Bag of Holding was procured, the shopper's dream!)

The Collected Quarterlies of the Phandalin Gazette


Here lieth the public record of our lovely first D&DV campaign.  They players discovered the Lost Mines of Phandalin and routed the evils within.  Gundren the Dwarf and Nooner the Hobbit now run the place as a lucrative mining cooperative.  Althea's adventures continue...

Phandalin Gazette Spring 


"Four strangers walked into our town today, dragging a snotnosed goblin behind them. They had wagon full of supplies for the town that we were all very happy to receive. They even brought some goods to the Lionshield Coster that old Linene had completely given up for lost to bandits. The strangers went to the Townmaster, who didn't impress them much but he locked their goblin in his cell and offered 100gp if for the heads of 20 orcs from Wyvern Tor. They visited the Stonehill Inn and Nooner reacquainted himself with the innkeeper Toby, who told them the Red Brands gang had been getting worse, extorting the town and even killing the Woodworker and taking his family! This was no good. After a short visit to Sister Gahaele of the Lucky Lady Shrine, and a late night visit to the Miner's Exchage proprietor, the fiery Halia, these new to towners proceeded to the Old Manor Hill by way of Alderlead farm. There they were lead by a quarterling named Carp to a secret tunnel entrance that lead to a creepy cavern with a chasm. The group chose to sneak left/West where they found a door at the bottom of a flight of stairs. Rashly opening the door, there were discovered therein three large and hairy goblins tormenting a tiny runt of a goblin. The goblins were confused at first, but violence focused their minds and they attacked with fury.
When the battle was over, Red Branch guards were running down the hall to investigate but they forgot to look under the bed and soon followed a fleeing goblin rather than look under the bed...



Phandalin Gazette Summer

It seems the wizard had been seduced by the powerful promises of this Black Spider. Next stop, Cragmaw Castle!   But in the meantime the elf wizard is hard at work scribing while the others enjoy a well earned flagon of ale. The townspeople are helpful, but worry there is more to do, flushing out a rumored band of Orcs, for instance.  Gather provisions and prepare for the two day trek to the Crags of the Goblin King.

Hero of the town! Those who stood up to the ruffians plaguing Phandalin have left the burgeoning burg to search for their lost cousin, brother of the same stone, Gundren, who may be held captive in the Goblin Castle of Cragmaw, just within the Grimm Forest. Indeed the castle perches seven towers haphazardly atop a rocky tor, doors ajar and masonry crumbling. A stealthy approach was soon scuppered by a silent kick upon a door, disturbing the meal making of the goblin fleet, and setting up a blood bath of greenskinned chaos.
The running battle came to a close thanks to the Sleep spell of Althea and the skull splitting axe of the new boy, Toulon GoblinCleaver. Still, the halfling was sore wounded, and the fighter as well, nearly eaten by a tentalcled and beaked foe. They took stock of golden prayers tools, even as the sun began to set outside, and the gobbo Danzig lover had gotten away. The party is wounded, low on spells, but determined to make their mark.

Phandalin Gazette Fall


Lo, the intrepid three had lost a friend to the tentacles of crawling beast out of time yet they forged ahead, unwilling to leave a task unfinished, yet they kept their wits about them. In the heart of an inhospitable lair they hatched a plan. The redheaded Althea used her mystic arts to disguise herself so that she looked to all as one of the hulking hairy goblin kind that lurked about these ruins. If only she could sound like one! Drawing her companions along as if captured prisoners, she came upon a barracks with two skinny brutes bewildered and terrified to release a great beast who pushed out from behind the door. An owl-headed bear! The dwarf offered it warm rations, and then a freshly slain goblin to sate its insatiable hunger and the three decamped to the camp of the Goblin King Grol, long of beard and broad of axe. Again, Althea's trickery came to the fore as she Charmed the old man with pleasantries and turned him to battling his own formerly captive owlbear, which was to be the death of him. With the escape of the Dark Elf, King Grol dead, and Cousin Gundren rescued and revived, the heroes headed home to Phandalin, to carouse and recoup, and think of the lost riches of Wave Echo Cave, said to hold the very Forge of Spells.




Sunday, April 6, 2014

Picaresque of Prince Phineous, from Elfland

Wherein a Hero arrives Young to the World

Young Phin had not made much on himself in the short century of his life and his mother got tired of him hanging about shooting at acorns so she brought him to her presence and said, "Phineous it is time for you to make a journey to the mortal world.  There is a lovely lady there who's son has gone missing and she has gone to with Wishing Well and asked for help.  Be a good lad and go forth and help her.  You will learn much.  Find the son, and find me a present you think I might fancy as well.  Be careful.  Call on me only if you must."

So Phineous the Archer crossed into the mortal realm and offered his aid to Queen Numenia of Red Oak Keep.  She sent him forthwith, accompanied by a footman, Jergen.  They entered the forest, for the Princeling Parcel had been picnic-ing when he did not return to his party three days before.  Coming to a stream, there was a hostile serpent in the water.  As Phin and Jergen braced themselves against the blue reptile they were unknowingly stalked an even larger and more sinister foe, a reddish lizard the size of an ox.  It was touch and go for a moment, but the companions were unexpectedly aided by the appearance of tall and sickly warrior, uncouth and savage, who called herself Mila the Merciless.  She knew where the prince had gone, "Yonder hillock, where the dead oak broods."

Three strong, they ascended the hill and the sun set.  Ill-mannered gremlins in the branches above cursed them and threw sticks, so they ran into a chamber formed by a bole in the trees large trunk.  In the bowls of the oak a crack in the ground lead down through roots and earth to a subterranean chamber unexpected.


Phineous was shocked to discover a domecile of worship built by his mortal brethren generations previous.   There were ancient constellations formed by a crystalline ceiling refracting the rising moon in the sky above. "Lovely." Now a voice came like a rumble out the earth's diaphram, a short creature made of earth and stone revealed itself as "Duhr" and craved crystals and diamonds so as not to continue consuming the crystal decorations of this holy place.  They conversed a moment, before the shorter lived warriors urged Phin to hurry down a set of stairs. "We could be followed, or trapped by yonder gremlins, Phin, no time to waste," grunted the swordsman Jergen.

Descending a gracefully spiraling set of stairs, a large hall was revealed, though of stone, a forest of pine trees had been carved out of the pillars of rock.  Small and disturbing folk accosted the three with offers of rat-on-a-stick, stopped clock-watches, grog, and more.  These well ordered trees served as informal stalls for a Goblin Market.

Disgusted, Phin strode through while holding his nose.  Stepping through a doorways carved to seem like the open mouth of a devils face, he was shocked again to behold three counterparts to his troupe, but these short scrawny, and less than beautiful, entertaining themselves with jokes and civilized clothing.  Upon introductions, the suspicious curs reached for weapons and treacherously shot first, wounding Mila with a crossbow bolt.  Now Jergen showed his class, and leaped forward, slicing and stabbing with two swords, cutting down both, then chasing a third through a further doorway and out onto a precarious rope bridge where the cowardly goblin slipped and Jergen showed no mercy, treading upon fingers and sending it howling into the darkness below.

Crossing the chasm (which opened above to the stars and a tree silhouetted), come upon a chamber full of ill-gotten goods, chests of cheeses, books, armor, and an army's banner depicting a One-Eyed Skull, but while sifting through these accoutrements an ambush was sprung, from a shaft in the un-examined ceiling fell a sophisticated net attached to a rope.  The net swept up Jergen and Phin, while the quick footed Mila jumped clear.  Jergen fell to cutting at the thick knotty ropes while Phin stumbled over the words to a spell and Mila furiously leapt at the rope and attempted to climb up it.  She didn't get far as rocks rained down upon her, causing her to fall.

Hastily, the three freed themselves and scurried out of harms way as the jeers taunts and insults of the goblins in the ceiling rang in their ears.
Mila swayed.  She was wounded and a little drunk.  "We'll could go down the stairs," said Jergen.  "But that leaves foes behind us and they might be guarding something worth finding."  "What ho," said Phineous.  "My keen eyes see a bit of elven stone-carving here.  Carefully concealed writing it seems: 'Speak friend and enter.'  Well then: Melloch."

A crack appeared, and the stone door swung silently inward.